February & March 2018

February & March 2018

6 years

February & March 2018 have been a bit of a seesaw. There have been positives and negatives, and I have been trying my best to keep up.

๐Ÿถย Alice

Alice Ava Grace

Alice has been a giant ray of sunshine that has helped me through a tough few months. She has settled into my family so well (except two cats who are not okay with her yet). She is very playful and loves all of her toys, going for walks and having naps with her human. It’s incredible to see how fast she is growing and how much she is learning. I love my little Alice.ย ๐Ÿ’–

๐Ÿ˜ญย Bad News

I received some bad news from a friend, and it has been very hard to process. I want to respect their privacy and won’t provide any details. What I can say is that it started out as shocking news, became worse and developed into a worst-case scenario. I have been trying to be the best support I can and help them in any way possible. I know I would be a complete mess if it wasn’t for my family and best friends.ย ๐Ÿ˜

From the bad news, I fell into a spiral. I kept expecting the worst to happen, and I was caught in anxious loops thinking and overthinking the same things. I found myself crawling into hibernation mode and needing isolation to catch my breath. Little tasks seemed like they were a monumental effort and doing the ‘person’ thing seemed way too hard.

It’s only in the last few days I have started to gain some ground. I realised I had distorted my priorities and I needed to reevaluate and remove the intense pressure I was placing on myself. I have been trying to cling to the positives and restructure. It’s an ongoing process, but I hope over the next month things will get better and I can do the ‘person’ thing.ย ๐Ÿ˜‚

โ˜ย Other News

  • ๐ŸŽ“ย I started my first class at the new Uni. I post updates on my study blog if you want to see what I have been doing.
  • ๐ŸŽ‚ย I turned 31 on the 11th of March.
  • ๐Ÿค”ย Other things probably happened and I forget.. haha.

๐Ÿ’ฌย Questions

  1. What did you do in February & March 2018?
  2. Do you have any plans for April?
  3. Do you have any tips for dealing with difficult news?

28 Responses

  1. Alice seems lovely ^_^ Laughing at the placement of your cat above Alice, looking down, and Alice looking up with her puppy eyes. It’s too bad about the tough news you received from your friend ๐Ÿ™ When our friends are hurting, we hurt as well. I’m glad you are recovering though, and I too hope you can do the ‘person’ thing in April.

    My February and March were packed. February I went to Spain with my husband for our early one year anniversary celebration due to a flight deal we found online. It was a lot of fun, lots of yummy food, and we learned a lot on the trip. But the later part of Spain I got sick, possibly from food we ate. Then my husband got sick when we came home, and took even longer to recover than me, since it was from a cold. In March we started taking East Coast Swing together at a place called “May I have This Dance?”. We played Dungeons and Dragons with some friends. We did a lot of volunteering, but we do that every month. It just seemed like almost everyday we had something to do after work, but it was great.

    For April, we are continuing our dance lessons, continuing our volunteering, and playing Dungeons and Dragons. I’d like to get more into music, and possibly join a band, not like a band that performs in front of a large audience, but just a small group of people, just cause I miss that camaraderie, of making music with other people, and each person plays a part, and the whole is more beautiful than its parts, and sharing that joy and fun in making music with others.

    For me talking about it with someone close to me helps, and hearing what they have to say about the situation. Sometimes others can see different perspectives, or give insights. I also try to spend more time with the person who the bad news happened to, and bring them food, or such. They need someone to talk to and someone to comfort them, and help make sure they stay healthy. I also share with God, and pray for Him to help. Also letting myself be sad, and letting myself cry, and letting out emotions helps. Journaling also helps with sorting through thoughts that are happening inside, instead of letting it all get muddy and messy.

  2. I’m sorry to hear about your friend ๐Ÿ™ That’s scary that it ended up being the worst-case scenario, but that’s great that you’re doing your best to be there for them. I’m also glad that Alice has helped you through these tough times! She looks absolutely adorable in that photo! I’m hoping April will be a much better month for you <3

    1. I celebrated my birthday in March too! Our birthdays are so close to each other!
    2. My main plan for April is going on vacation ๐Ÿ˜‰
    3. I don't think I have any good tips for dealing with difficult news ๐Ÿ™ It's never easy, but I think that finding time to temporarily take my mind off of it helps. Sometimes you just need a little break before handling it again.

  3. *Hugs* Sorry things have been rough! I know how that can feel. I always overthink! XD It can be such a pain!

    But at least you got Alice to help you through it! Animals can be funny with other animals…when my sister got her dog, my dog protected her in a way. When she went by the stairs she herded her away. She loves other animals. She gets excited if we bring a new one home. My sister’s dog on the other hand, doesn’t care for other animals except my dog. XD

  4. Hi Kassy, it’s been awhile. Alice looks so cute in that pic! I wish I had a dog but I’m stuck with cats instead. Still love the feline family though ๐Ÿ™‚

    Friendships are always important, and we tend to always be there for each other, especially when the chips are down. But sometimes, there can be a limit in which it was better that we don’t get ourselves involved with problems with friends. Sometimes, we just have to listen and trust them, and when they need help, that they would turn to us.

    So, for the answers to the questions…

    #1 – Since I’m a practicing Catholic, I always searched for the most challenging habits to give up for Lent. This year, I gave up blogging altogether and devoted my full study to Javascript. I still feel like a failure because other distractions and things in life just got in the way. However, on Good Friday (3/30), my family and I went to see Cirque du Soleil Crystal during their 3-day tour in San Jose. It was the first time that Cirque du Soleil has created an acrobatic performance on ice so it was a real treat!

    #2 – For April, aside from continuing web dev studies (and still hunting for a job), I joined a particular fandom of a J-Pop boy group who I feel really deserves to be known. I’ve written about them on my latest blog entry.

    #3 – If I hear any type of difficult news that involve the ones we love, the first thing I would do is listen to them if they decide to open up. I know that friends should always be there for each other, but at the same time, I don’t want to pry into their personal business just because of my worries for them. So, instead, listen, trust them, and when they do need help, they will come to you. Being by your friend’s side is one thing, but you also have to keep in mind of the respect factor as well.

  5. Kassy I am very sorry you, and your friend, hit a terribly rough spot. Please know that you and said friend are in my thoughts. I hope everything will work out for the better.

    What did you do in February & March 2018?
    -February and March have been busy for me solely due to school work. It’s been very challenging having to read all of this coursework, and condense it into enough time to still study and complete assignments.
    Do you have any plans for April?
    -April is going to be busy due to these classes will end, and immediately my new ones will begin without a breath in between. I also have a camping trip across the state May 4th-8th so I’m working ahead of time to ensure I am planning well.
    Do you have any tips for dealing with difficult news?
    -I am a religious person, therefore when times get tough I lean on my bible a bit harder than I usually do. Of course, ideally I should do it all the time, not just when I’m feeling depressed or life gets overly difficult. However, regardless of your religious preferences, leaning on a trusted family member or friend is always helpful! If you’re introverted, I’d suggest keeping a written journal to just expel your thoughts. That way, your issues are still private, but you (hopefully) feel better about “sharing” your difficult time.

  6. Ahhh your new dog is so cute!! I hope your cats will accept her soon ๐Ÿ˜Š your home seems to be lively

    I’m sorry to hear about your friend… Hopefully things will work out ๐Ÿ˜ญ

    Happy belated birthday btw โค๏ธ

    What did you do in February & March 2018?

    I mostly binge watched a lot of shows on Netflix and it’s super bad ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ

    Do you have any plans for April?

    April will be a busy month, I have a lot of deadlines for school and group projects and such… I don’t have any clear plan yet ๐Ÿ™

    Do you have any tips for dealing with difficult news?

    I usually try to do not think too hard about bad news at first by doing something relaxing that takes my mind off of it, then take time to process it properly. I also vent my feelings to my closest friends, getting their insight and comfort on the matter, it helps me feel better.

  7. Aw, there is absolutely nothing better than opening up a blog post to see a beautiful puppy dog looking back at me. Alice is absolutely adorable! I’m glad she’s fitting in (well, except for the cats).

    The bad news is unfortunate, but understandable. I think anytime something major happens to someone close to us it sort of reaquaints us with just how fragile life is and it’s hard not to allow that to spiral out of control. I’m happy to hear you’re starting to gain some ground with that negativity. Just the fact you managed a blog post is huge when you’re struggling like that so definitely be proud of yourself for that. To some it may seem like nothing but when the world’s crashing down it’s important to celebrate all victories, no matter how small.

    Oh and happy belated birthday!! I hope you had a lovely day. ๐Ÿ™‚

    1. Honestly the other thing I can remember of note about February and March is the fact that I finally started the process of applying for my UK spouse visa. After six years of being in a long-distance relationship my husband and I have finally managed to meet the requirements needed for him to sponsor me on such a visa so gathering all the paperwork and sending off the application during the last two months has been a big ball of nervousness and excitement and just all of the things. Fingers crossed by the end of April the visa will be in my hand and I’ll be on my way to finally live with him!

    2. Apart from the hopeful upcoming move, I have no plans for April. It’s sort of hard to plan anything when you’re stuck just waiting to see if things will be approved or not! I don’t mind though. I like that it gives me a little extra time to spend with my family and friends here before I leave.

    3. Tips for dealing with difficult news? That’s tough. I guess my first thing is just accepting the negativity. I have a hard time because sometimes when bad things happen I get upset and then I get upset with myself for getting upset and it becomes this vicious cycle. So now when that happens, I try to just accept that that’s what I’m feeling now and remembering that it’s temporary and then I try to do activities to leviate the bad feelings such as going for a walk, spending time with loved ones, or getting lost in my art. I also keep a little journal where I record two or three things that I found memorable or enjoyed about each day before I go to bed which I think helps. It allows me to balance out some of the negativity in the world with a little of the positivity in my own environment.

    <3 Take care Kassy
    Asti | atypicalnarrative.com

  8. I love the way that pets have the most positive effect on our lives. I honestly don’t know how I would’ve gotten through certain points in my life without my kitty!
    I’m so sorry that you’ve been dealing with so much stress. Honestly, my go to when I get bad news or am anxious is to work out and relieve that anxiety. I also try to breath and remember that most things are out of my control, but what IS in my control is how I react to it. Try to stay positive and keep moving forward!
    Also, happy belated birthday! Even though it has started rough, 31 WILL be an amazing year for you!

    Susie | http://milehighdreamers.com

  9. I’m so glad to hear that Alice has been there with you over the last two months to help you through the tougher times. I know when I was younger I always wanted a pet to help me get through tough times at school, they really help!

    I’m sorry about your friend’s news ๐Ÿ™ Sending lots of positivity and love your way!

    Happy belated birthday Kassy <3

  10. Happy birthday!!!! I hope the rest of spring is a more bright for you. Keep hugging that cute fluff ball! My maine coon Tomo always brightens my day!!!

    Stay strong for your friend! <3

  11. I just want to squeeze and pet Alice. She is so adorable.

    I’m so sorry to hear about your friend. I hope everything works out. It’s always tough hearing about rough news and you feel helpless. I’ve been going through the same thing myself with one of my friends. ๐Ÿ™

  12. Alice is adorable! Iโ€™m so glad to hear how happy sheโ€™s making you.

    Sorry to hear about the bad news. Thatโ€™s never easy. My only advice would be just to take each day as it comes, and donโ€™t be too hard on yourself if some days are difficult. Hope it all works out okay, and your friend is alright. *hugs*

    My February and March were mainly spent organising my engagement party and working. I canโ€™t remember much else that happened!

    Hope you had a lovely birthday, despite everything thatโ€™s going on.

  13. OMG that pup is such a little angel! โ™ฅ I’m sorry that you had some bad news but I’m glad you were able to pull through and realize your issues with the stress of it.
    Welcome to the world of being 31! hehe I keep forgetting I’m over 30. What I’m not still 22? haha
    My only Plans for April is to see a Micheal Jackson impersonator and to keep losing weight. XD

  14. I think having animals is probably the best way to deal with some of the more difficult things that happen in life. They help as well as close family and friends. I have to say that I really like how you ask questions at the end of your entries. ๐Ÿ™‚

    1. What did you do in February & March 2018?
    Survived. The winter where I’m at feels like it’s starting to drag on too long. We still have snow on the ground. So I spent time concentrating on making things with yarn and some light doodling in a private journal.

    2. Do you have any plans for April?
    Spring cleaning and getting some seeds going for the summer porch garden. I’m also going to start planning a couple of small build projects for the house because as soon as that snows gone, I really need to build shelves ๐Ÿ˜€

    3. Do you have any tips for dealing with difficult news?
    Take one day at a time and if it’s with someone, be there if they need someone to listen too and let them talk it out and through. If it’s particularly heavy news, be sure to make time for yourself and allow yourself some time to process it (I usually write or sketch or make something.. particularly bad news or if I’m particularly anxious, I tend to cook/bake a lot).

  15. First off, happy Birthday! Our birthdays are so close! I hope yours was awesome.

    Sorry about your friend. Sad news is always difficult to hear and deal with. A general rule I made for my life is if something is getting me down, I ask myself, “What can I do to fix this?” If I can’t do anything to fix it, then it’s out of my control, and I try to tell myself that I shouldn’t stress things I can’t control. The key word there is “try” because it’s really hard to do that, but this life rule has gotten me through some tough times. Your friend’s situation may not apply here as I’m being incredibly general here, but I do hope you and he/she get through it! I’ll keep you guys in my thoughts and prayers.

    Alice is frakkin adorable. <3

  16. I’m sorry to hear about your friend. Sending you, them, and their family my best wishes. It’s understandable that you’re taking some time for yourself. I strongly believe that time heals a bit so take all of the time you need! Self-care and self-love are very important.

    It’s cool that you have a study blog! I used to have one but then had a hard time keeping up with it. Power to you! Happy belated birthday!

  17. Allliceee she looks so cute!

    #1. Feb and March was a very busy month for me for work, church and travel stuffs esp catching up my blog entries in the midst of being busy.

    #2. My sched for April s full, i just went to the beach last weekend, and this coming weekend ill be hiking. ๐Ÿ™‚ So it’s a pretty busy month ahead and weeks!

    #3. normally talk with people about it and trusted ones so they can help lessen my burden. Pray for it and do some actions if needed to solve issues.

  18. There are definitely things I forget over the course of a month, so I donโ€™t blame you for forgetting some things that probably happened. ๐Ÿ˜‚

    So glad to hear Alice is settling in! Iโ€™m sure she will become friends with those cats super soon. โ˜บ๏ธ

    Iโ€™m sorry to hear about the bad news. Doing the person thing can be hard sometimes when you just want to curl up into a ball and do nothing. I hope your friend is OK. Sometimes bad news can really melt us.

    Now that you ask, I donโ€™t remember what I did in February and March. I did write blog posts about them though. ๐Ÿคช Work was a bit busy and I spent a very long time (a month…) on the one task. I was given time to learn and take my time with it since it was very challenging for my skills. In the end I finally did it and it was relieving, but there were some days that I found it excruciating. ๐Ÿ˜ฐ I went rock climbing a couple of times, as I have been trying to go at least once every month. I also did an internal talk at work about my fitness journey. And another thing that happens once a month is our codebar workshop event ๐Ÿ™‚ And that was successful both times.

  19. Alice is such a cute dog. Seeing her brings a huge smile on my face. I am so glad you have her to keep your spirits up. With that said, I’m sorry to read that it’s been rough for you the last couple of months ๐Ÿ™ I do hope the situation with your friend improve, and I hope you will have a better April. Know that if you ever need to talk, I am here!

  20. Alice is such a cutie! I feel like it’s very difficult to get cats to become used to having a dog in the house, that was the same problem we had with our family dog! It’s been about 3 years and one of our cats still hates our dog lol.

    Awh, I really hope you’re doing better! I completely understand what you’re going through. Sending you and your friend some positive vibes and love! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Happy belated birthday!

    1. I’ve been studying so much during February and March, I feel like I’ve lost motivation for school since summer vacation is coming around.
    2. April has been my month off from work since we are remodeling for the entire month. It’s been a nice little vacation, but I’ve used up all my extra time to catch up on schoolwork. Which isn’t very fun. :’)
    3. CW: death.
    My best friend’s father had passed away unexpectedly on new year’s day. I became paralyzed when he told me. The only thing I did was take a breather, and let him know I was there for him for anything he needed. It was very difficult for me to process this information because his father was one of the people who pushed me to go back to school. If it wasn’t for him, I probably would’ve never gone back to college so soon. While I was devastated, I tried to become strong for my friend. He needed me to be strong. I would talk with close friends about the situation and they would give me advice. I talked with my friend everyday, just to see how he was doing. We live three hours away from each other because of school, but I dropped everything one weekend to visit him. It was much needed!
    I got a puppy in the beginning of January and he helps me whenever I’m sad, as well! He’s my rock whenever I need emotional support.

    I hope whatever you and your friend is going through is temporary. I will keep you both in my thoughts!

  21. Happy belated birthday! And Alice is soooo adorable!! I’m glad she’s been a good companion for you throughout your difficult times! I’ve been really wanting to get a dog or a cat, but I still haven’t been able to take the step… I really think I need to get one soon for my mental health and overall health, though, and I’m glad to hear your puppy has been helpful. Hope the past month has been a little more stable!

  22. Happy belated birthday! I hope things with your friend have subsided, or improved, since you published this.

    1. I barely remember February, but come March I was siiiick. It was such a pain. I thought it wasn’t going to end. I was worried, actually, that I was gonna need to use my EpiPen and go to the ER because there were times when I couldn’t figure out whether it was an allergic reaction or I was just sick…and aside from the hospital bill and needing a new autoinjector prescription, I figured it was best to take the chance that I needed it than to, like, not use it and have needed it. But I got better eventually, and that’s good. :3
    2. April, I dealt with my carpal tunnel syndrome. It’s still bugging me, but I’m trying to take things easy.
    3. I tend to drown myself in comedy. It balances my mood out and keeps me from falling into too much of a depressive state. It’s how I make it in my life—I laugh to ease the pain, even if it means I have to laugh at myself sometimes.

    Much love. <3

  23. Can’t get over how adorable Alice is.

    I’m so sorry to hear your friend had such bad news, and I hope you are holding up okay too. Sounds like you’re an amazing, supportive friend that they’re lucky to have.

    Happy belated birthday ๐Ÿ™‚

  24. I literally sobbed and followed Alice on Instagram immediately I think a while back. She is SO gorgeous. I can’t get over her ๐Ÿ˜ญ

    I’m sorry to hear that you received bad news. I get like that sometimes where it’s very difficult for me to get myself out of bed and not wanting to interact with anyone or anything but just try and process what I’ve been told. I’m glad to see that you’ve started gaining some ground now! Getting there is better than going nowhere โค๏ธ

    Happy belated Birthday!

  25. Having animals in your life really helps in coping with difficult situations. For some reason, they just bring so much joy in our lives and everything seems lighter and happier whenever they’re around <3 Alice is gorgeous and I'm glad that she's settling in quite well! Cats really take a long time to adjust to newcomers, so I wouldn't worry too much for now. Haha!

    So sorry to hear about your friend, I hope everything gets better soon ๐Ÿ™ Your friend is still lucky though, because you're trying your best to be supportive <3

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